Michiko Aoyama's What You Are Looking For is in the Library

Michiko Aoyama’s What You Are Looking For is in the Library, translated into English by Alison Watts, offers a tender, thought-provoking glimpse into the search that lies at the center of each of our lives: a search for purpose, for meaning, for connection, and, fundamentally, for the magic that is self-discovery. With each chapter, Aoyama takes the reader into the perspective of a new character, a unique individual with equally distinctive struggles, hopes, and dreams, all of which inevitably lead them to the library.

The first chapter immerses the reader in the life of 21-year old Tomoka, a womenswear sales assistant living in Tokyo, who finds the city to be far less idealistic than she had always imagined as a young girl living in the countryside. Struggling to find purpose, feeling fundamentally fraudulent and as if she has fallen irrevocably behind her peers, Tomoka goes to the library to attend a computer class but winds up getting so much more when she meets the enigmatic character at the heart of this novel: Sayuri Komachi, the librarian. Sayuri, described as being impressively large, blank in expression, and overwhelmingly calm, asks one simple question of Tomoka: What are you looking for?

It is this question that punctuates the novel, appearing in the lives of the various characters we encounter, and prompting very different answers. Once she has her answer, Sayuri conjures up a mostly straightforward list of texts to consult, yet always includes a wildcard, one book that is unlike the others and seems to have no right to be on the list. That, and a handcrafted felt toy of her choosing. With each absurd but endearing encounter, the reader is drawn further into the world of the novel, lulled into an almost meditative, pensive state by Aoyama’s simple yet sophisticated prose, and the steady flow of each character’s inner dialogue. As each member of Aoyama’s eclectic cast makes sense of Sayuri’s suggestions, the reader is taken along for the ride, becoming equally invested in the struggles of a recently retired businessman and the trials of an unemployed but gifted manga artist. Ultimately, the reader, like each character, is rewarded for the journey as every character finds answers to their problems through time, effort, and creativity--all things facilitated by their visits to the community library.

In my own experience of the novel, I found it to be at once deeply soothing and thought provoking. Not only did I find resonance with each character, irregardless of their age, lifestyles, and talents, but I also caught myself reflecting on my own unique challenges and meditating on them in much the same way as every protagonist I met. As a recent college graduate with much to learn about the world and many pathways before me, I found that Aoyama’s book provided a very reassuring perspective: while life is by no means easy, not only am I far from alone in my search for meaning, but regardless of what has already been written in the pages of my life’s book, as the selfsame reader of that book, I have agency over how to read it. If Aoyama’s librarian has anything to say about it, reading is always an active exercise of the reader’s ability to interpret meaning, not the passive reception of some pre-formed meaning. Perhaps it is best summed up by 21st-century literary theorists Nealon and Giroux, who assert: “Like texts, expressions or clues or golf courses don’t simply speak for themselves; they don’t simply contain a meaning. Rather, we must always interpret them” (22). In other words, much as each of Aoyama’s characters learns through their visits to the library, meaning is made, not found, and we must be active readers not just of the texts under our noses, but of the world all around us.

And who knows? Maybe what you are looking for really is in the library, after all.

References

Nealon, Jeffrey T. and Susan Searls Giroux. “Reading.” The Theory Toolbox: Critical Concepts for the Humanities, Arts, and Social Sciences. 2nd ed. Lanham, MD, Rowman & Littlefield Publishers, Inc, 2012.